I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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