is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize