So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
