I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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