so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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