..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize