True but thats because hes a fetus.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
A+ Viking dick
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
