After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
