We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I am spending my child support on dildos
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize