This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I party with great urgency now.
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