how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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