My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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