Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
