But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
