So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Why are your pants in the freezer?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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