Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left. http://tfl.nu/94x2
  Replies (19) Good night (9108) Bad night (696)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch. http://tfl.nu/hocy
  Replies (39) Good night (1046) Bad night (1801)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me. http://tfl.nu/tfpk
  Replies (73) Good night (654) Bad night (3030)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face http://tfl.nu/tdg0
  Replies (28) Good night (3031) Bad night (1019)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen. http://tfl.nu/ni4j
  Replies (23) Good night (5947) Bad night (605)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me. http://tfl.nu/n11o
  Replies (46) Good night (2337) Bad night (8045)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor. http://tfl.nu/8ie3
  Replies (10) Good night (1795) Bad night (3591)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference. http://tfl.nu/9fcx
  Replies (7) Good night (2309) Bad night (1191)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST. http://tfl.nu/xkvr
  Replies (21) Good night (1943) Bad night (473)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation http://tfl.nu/uy0z
  Replies (5) Good night (1334) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you. http://tfl.nu/55zo
  Replies (4) Good night (1327) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air. http://tfl.nu/cigy
  Replies (8) Good night (1910) Bad night (487)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut. http://tfl.nu/9z43
  Replies (2) Good night (1069) Bad night (313)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment http://tfl.nu/bym2
  Replies (6) Good night (614) Bad night (1209)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Is she okay?

  (773): View more from Illinois

  She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (858): Is she okay? (773): She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine. http://tfl.nu/rwoi
  Replies (0) Good night (393) Bad night (214)

Randomize