I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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