try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
