no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
