can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
