: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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