awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
