my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
