He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
