Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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