u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
