Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
