I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
