you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
