Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
