im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize