Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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