Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize
