please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
