Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
