Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
