you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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