My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
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