I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
he just fucked me for my cheese..
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
All I want is dick and wine.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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