dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize