was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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