I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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