@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
