Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
