i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
