It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
