After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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