Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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