chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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