I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
did you just send me my own nude
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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